Assistance, Please

I’ve been mulling what follows over for 48 hours. Arriving at no easy answer/resolution, I turn to my fellow PPPers for any thoughts, suggestions, recommendations or other input you might offer.

As many know, I reside in a townhouse situated within an apartment complex. Given the length of time here, my walks, and general interaction from sitting on the front stoop, I meet many residents. Some, I know by name. Most, I recognize. As the property manager (newly hired, relatively) said last week, most know who I am.

One of the latter is a young man I’ll refer to as W (he’s a writer). W and his spouse (“S” hereinafter) reside in a townhouse in the building to my South.I’ve not met S.

Thursday evening W knocked on my door looking to bum a cigarette. No problem there. As we were standing outside, I asked W how things were as it was apparent he wanted to talk. He responded with a not very good. He then told me that in early November, the little boy (about one year old) that I had met earlier this Fall had died suddenly. My head reeling, I made the appropriate noises and told him about my wife’s death four years ago. As we talked, it became clear that even though the boy was not W’s child (biologically), W had been very attached to him. W then mentioned he was in counseling with an appropriate individual whose name I recognized. We continued to talk, with me listening and offering such bits of learning I had to offer. During this time (about an hour), W’s cell phone rang multiple times, irking W. He finally answered, and after that conversation, he and I continued. W was quite agitated.

W acknowledged he was working through his grief, having moved recently to the anger stage. W then went on to tell me S refused to get any help, preferring to habituate various bars nightly for the purported purpose of becoming and remaining numb. Further, S had locked W’s car and taken the keys (which is why W was out of smokes). The rationale was to prevent W from potentially harming himself. I think otherwise, but whatever. Then, S calls again, and got most disturbed by the fact W was not home, but rather out talking with a neighbor. S kept getting louder and louder, finally terminating the call. W said S doesn’t like their next-door neighbor, who has been trying to help. The feeling is mutual; I’m acquainted with the neighbor (who has an adorable 15 month old daughter).

The next day, W and S’s neighbor came by. She related that there had been a terrible argument after S had returned from the bar (“shit-faced”, she called it), and S had threatened her earlier that day. After she clarified that W hadn’t been talking to her, S went ballistic and wanted to know with whom W had been talking. She didn’t know, but had a feeling it was I involved. So she could stay truthful, I neither confirmed nor denied. Her parting comment was that anyone who had been talking to W needed to be on their toes.

The question(s): If W comes back, I intend to do my best to help in any way I can. Should I refuse to so do? If S shows up shit-faced and threatening, 911 gets called by me. No further discussion on that. However, if S comes by and just wants to talk (without W) about the boy’s death, should I listen or suggest S find another outlet? If I was still practicing, the answer would be easier.

Any advice, etc., offered will be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

N.B. Full disclosure: W’s mother (single) has seen me during my excursions and has bugged W about who I am. I’ve told W the bare details, and he wishes to introduce the two of us. If his mother is the woman with whom I had a conversation two months ago utside W’s front door, I’m interested.

787 Dreamliner teaches Boeing costly lesson on outsourcing

The airliner is billions of dollars over budget and about three years late. Much of the blame belongs to the company’s farming out work to suppliers around the nation and in foreign countries.

When is it “time?”

In April, 2006, I stood in a sterile examining room, cradling Rocky’s head in my arms and telling him repeatedly that I loved him, as the vet administered a lethal injection that ended his life. Rocky was cancer-stricken. He had been given only three months to live, yet he managed to “fight the good fight” for nearly a year.

Some of you may have noticed that I always wear a dangling earring in my right ear lobe – that is my daily homage to my fallen friend.

I have another Golden Retriever now, Rufus, a wonderful dog that I rescued. I also care for my daughter’s Cocker Spaniel, Cookie.

Cookie has epilepsy. Last New Year’s weekend, she had five Grand Mal seizures in a twelve hour period. She came to live with me temporarily, since she was due to be put down. Miraculously, she stopped having frequent seizures and has been doing well, with few seizures, most of which were mild.

That is, until this past Monday. Cookie had two severe seizures, seven hours apart, and hasn’t fully recovered from the last one. She had been a happy, eight years old pup that loved to be around me and loved it when I said “who deserves a biscuit?!?!” Now she is listless and barely responds when I offer her a milkbone.

It is most likely “time.”

The question goes much deeper than a decision concerning a lovable Cocker Spaniel. What about Grandma and Grandpa? What about a spouse that is looking at the last days of a long life?

Although I knew it was right, it was difficult and  heartbreaking to decide to finally have Rocky put down.

How would I handle such a decision if it were thrust upon me regarding a child or a spouse? Choosing to end life-support has to be the most difficult decisions one will ever face.

There is a great debate raging in our society about “end of life” choices.

Where do you stand?

William Stephenson Clark

You Know What Else is Un-American, Rand Paul?

— from Kate Sheppard, Mother Jones contributer

Newly minted Republican Senate candidate Rand Paul apparently thinks that criticizing BP for the Gulf spill is “really un-American.” Because, you know, “sometimes accidents happen.”

You know what’s un-American? British Petroleum. You know what else is un-American? Operating your drilling rig in US waters under flag of the Marshall Islands so you can skirt Coast Guard oversight.

Here in Kansas we don’t have to worry about oil spills. At least untill Coffeyville KS floods again! ~ sekanblogger

What we’re losing without noticing.

Civility. Compromise. Discussion.

Remember them? Me too. I feel as if I’ve been a witness to their destruction at the hands of Stridency, Volume, and Exclusion.

Consider the news this week. A man with Parkinson’s disease, engaged in the simple act of letting his opinion in the face a of anti-health care reform protest – shouted at, mocked, humiliated. Was he hit or injured? No. Can you say you didn’t believe it was about to happen the first time you saw that video? Me neither. I feared for him and admire his bravery.

Where was the voice of reason in that crowd? I’d like to think I live in a nation where people are not afraid to protect those who need it, regardless of their political stripe. Yet none of the bystanders raised a hand to stop what was going on. “This is wrong, brother. I don’t agree with him either, but this is wrong.” That is all it would have taken. It didn’t happen.

This morning’s news is that Congressmen in favor of health care reform were spat upon and called hateful names that dredge up shameful portions of our nation’s history. What has become of us when men who are responding to the voices of their constituents can be humiliated for doing their job?

An important principle of our nation gives us all a voice. We’re all blessed by that principle. I’m not sure that principle doesn’t imply that we use that voice responsibly. Who in that crowd on Capitol Hill yesterday said “this is wrong brother. I don’t agree with them either, but this is wrong”?

On social media sites, opinions on health care are often met with strident opposing responses that come across as dismissive of opinions other than what the responder holds. Friends and families become estranged because the political atmosphere calls for not only rejection of opposing opinions, but shaming those who hold them.

My son will vote in his first election in November. After seeing the tone of arguments made on-line by admired friends and family, he has made the choice to speak only with his vote on political matters. I’m proud he’ll stay engaged in the process, but saddened that the tone of discussion these days is driving his voice, and probably others, into silence.

This is wrong, brother. We don’t agree, that’s our right,  but this atmosphere is wrong.

Omawarisan

PUBLIC SQUARE 01/25/10

The following comment was made in reference to a program that feeds poor children:

“My grandmother was not a highly educated woman, but she told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed,” Bauer said, according to the Greenville News. “You’re facilitating the problem if you give an animal or a person ample food supply. They will reproduce, especially ones that don’t think too much further than that. And so what you’ve got to do is you’ve got to curtail that type of behavior. They don’t know any better.”

At a town hall meeting Thursday in northwestern South Carolina, Bauer noted his grandmother “told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed.”

The Republican lt. governor did not specify if he included Social Security, Medicare, veterans benefits, car company and Wall Street bailouts in the category of government assistance that he disdains.

“The problem is, there are so many folks now who don’t have to do a thing. In government, we continue to reward bad behavior. Anytime we give somebody money, we’re rewarding them. We’re telling them to keep doing what they’re doing. Government’s got to change,” he said. “Babies having babies, somebody’s got to talk about. … Education can not really be improved until we address the real problem.”

To fix that, he said, “If you receive goods or services from the government, you owe something back.”

 

The real reason I bring this up, a Political commentator this morning made the statement that they have yet to figure out whether this will be good for his campaign or bad for it?

REALLY? You have to take the time to figure out if such a statement and comparison is good or bad for the campaign?

Maybe then there is no debate left to be had, this is one screwed up world!

TOSMARTTOBEGOP

Truthful or Agenda Driven?

Does Joan Walsh have a point about these unnamed sources?   Is this another book that is clearly one of those that people will see what they want to see and disregard those parts that don’t fit their personal agenda?

Lilac

http://www.salon.com/news/opinion/joan_walsh/index.html?

I’ve seen it all now…….

Is this really what our society has come to need?  Do we value actual connection to another living human being or are we content to fill our need for companionship with  something like this?  Is there a real need for this product, as  some in the article suggest?  Maybe it is just me or I am truly changing into my mother and grandmother’s generation.  But I guess I could see some people needing this product.  It’s probably the only action some CONS will ever see. – LOL

Lilacluvr

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/01/10/roxxxy-sex-robot-photo-wo_n_417976.html

New Food?

I watched this great video.  It was a wake-up call for me. 

It is way past time that we think about ourselves and our food! 

 Let’s take the next few steps forward and help those  who follow after us!

iggydonnelly

Train Your Brain

25 ways to get smarter!

I found this article in The Daily Beast to be fascinating!  I haven’t checked out all the recommended links and don’t know whether their list is one to be relied on, but I’m betting at least a few of these hints will be appreciated!  Here is a shortened synopsis, but be sure to check out the entire list and reasons why these ideas made the list!

The Redistribution of Wireless Wealth: What is the Right Thing to Do?

My son received an ipod touch for Christmas from his mother.  With it he is able to connect to the internet where he can check his email and surf the web almost like he does when he sits before his computer.  My son’s and my PC are wired into our router in our basement.  My daughter has a wireless connection to the router for her computer in her upstairs bedroom.  Given that we had a degree of space to cover with the wireless option, I got a router that blasts quite a bit  more signal than I really need to cover my house.

I thought my wireless connection was password protected, but when my son set up his ipod touch in my house, we found that it is not, and thus anyone who has a wireless card could pick up my signal – throughout my block, I would guess.  This discovery led to my current ethical dilemma:  should I password protect my wireless connection?  Am I diminished in any way when someone, I don’t know, uses my wireless connection?  Does it cost me more if someone else uses the connection?  Since I think the answer to both questions is “No”.  I plan to leave it unprotected.  Am I missing anything in my thinking here, is what I am wondering?

If someone was using my internet access to commit cyber-crimes that would make me reconsider my decision, but I don’t know of that happening, and doubt I could ever know if that happened or not.  Should this possibility be enough to make me reconsider?  Thanks for any help you may be able to provide.

The Huffman Corollary: Does it Predict Our Doom?

This from a Q&A at the WashPo by Kevin Huffman:

“My worry is that we increasingly live in a world where people can’t agree on a common fact base. And if you can’t agree on facts – not how to respond to them, but the facts themselves – it’s hard to see how you ever get to agreement on justice or urgency.”

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/discussion/2009/12/10/DI2009121001819.html

The above paragraph said a lot to me.  I am also concerned about our ability to respond, collectively, to the  immense problems we face.  What do you bloggers think?

ETHICS . . . POLITICANS WORST NIGHTMARE.

There are currently two separate ethics investigations going on in Washington: investigations to see if Rep. Laura Richardson and Rep. Maxine Waters, both Democrats from California, violated rules of conduct. Rep. Laura Richardson’s case involves whether she received preferential treatment in the foreclosure and eventual re-acquisition of her home in Sacramento, California.

Waters is being investigated for allegedly seeking preferential treatment for a bank linked to her husband, the committee said. According to the panel’s announcement, the investigation will look into whether Waters or her husband benefited from any of her communications or actions involving One United Bank, in which her husband held stock and previously was a director.

At a time when politicians are under intense scrutiny by every pundit with a camera or a computer, one would think those same politicians would learn crime doesn’t pay. South Carolina has had its share of idiots as well, both Republicans, so it’s not limited to any one party. So what is it about politics that tends to bring out the worst in some people? Or do the statistics reflect the general population?  I can imagine the answer to that question runs the gamete of everything from stupidity to outright greed, to it isn’t any different than pick a city near you. But I think there’s a basic question that does need to be answered:  Is politics, hence party affiliation, really involved, or does the perp lose that when he or she walks the on the unethical side? My answer to that is: a crook is a crook, and what party they belong to makes no difference. I’ve seen it used too often when either a Democrat or  Republican is charged with a crime, then suddenly it’s their parties fault. One can list the unethical from both parties, and the list would be ten pages long, at least. So using party affiliation as a blaming factor for criminal behavior is pointless. Any other views?

jammer5

Talking Substance in an Age of Style

I am a huge fan of Randy Olson’s.  He directed the documentary A Flock of Dodos which covered the Kansas debate on evolution v. Intelligent Design.  Olson grew up in the Kansas City region, attended K.U. and his mother lived close to a proponant of the Intelligent Design position.

Dr. Olson has a PhD from Harvard where he studied evolutionary biology.  It has not been completely clear to me why Olson made a switch from a career as a marine biologist to a film maker, but I suspect his divorce  was a life-changing event.  Besides A Flock of Dodos, Olson completed a “mockumentary” on the global warming debate called Sizzle: A Global Warming Comedy which covered the the “scientific debate” against global warming.

Olson recently published a book entitled Don’t Be Such a Scientist: Talking Substance in an Age of Style.  In this work Dr. Olson covers the strength and weaknesses of film vs. other forms of communication.  Film doesn’t so much educate as it imspires.  Being new to these notions of films, this was quite an educational experience for me; I have a copy available for loan.

iggydonnelly

Does a belief in God constitute religion?

While reading “The Family”, I got to wondering about God and religion. If one assumes God exists, does it then become necessary to form religious beliefs? Are they one in the same?  There are over 4200 active religions in the world, all of them thinking they’re the one true religion. The average Christian religion posits one cannot attain heaven if one doesn’t take Christ into both their lives and hearts. That would leave out all atheists, Jews, Muslims and non-Christians. Quite a large group of humans destined for someplace other than heaven.

Jews believe Christ has not been on this planet, Buddhists believe in Buddha, Muslims believe in the prophet Mohammad, etc.. Would a God, any God, exclude such a population because of something they don’t  believe in? God supposedly told the Prophets, after the flood, He would not interfere in the affairs of man again. One can take that to mean there was no Son of God on earth, because if He did, wouldn’t that make God a liar? Can God lie?

My point is religion can be both a good and bad thing, and at the same time. How many wars have been fought in the name of religion? How many humans slaughtered in the name of Religion? Do those wars justify religion in any way? Conversely, and maybe more importantly, does religion justify war? Believe me, I know religion is abused by any number of people, Tony Alamo being one example, but the majority of religious people are good people. But is religion, in the long run, necessary to attain heaven? Is a religion, such as Catholicism, any better than an Australian tribe worshiping  Uluru? My opinion would be emphatically no. My base belief is if one lives the golden rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, that is all that is needed to attain heaven, assuming, again, heaven actually exists. That, to me at least, is not a religion, per se, but a core belief in humanity. Does that mean I’m destined for the bbq pit? I have no problem with religion, I just don’t think any organized religion is a deciding factor when it come to God’s judgment: He judges on how one lives their life.

Okay, can open: your thoughts? (Imagine this post on TBTSNBN)

jamnmer5