Power tools, a saw-all, hammer drill and the like are nothing truly new they all do exactly what the human species has always done with the tools they have. Saws to cut the materials that need to be cut and drills for making holes in things.

Other then I have wanted a saw-all since the first time I got to use one it still does not do anything that I could not have done with one type of saw or another. It does make it easier and that would be a valid reason to have one. But I am still saying and telling with a real sense of pride that I now have one!

As if being able to state that I have a saws-all is a true sign of achievement! It is something many men have simply bought on a whim or because they needed it for a special job so it was to the local hardware store and putting down the card. No more special achievements than that, yet somehow this has caused me great joy?  I have not done anything that I had not done with any other type of saw, hand saw, hack saw and the like.  Yet here I am feeling somehow more special or notable since I have a SAWS-ALL!

Is it just a male thing?  Our love of power tools and the feeling of accomplishment for having some special tool?  At times when I do as much brag about having one, I afterwards feel a little silly.  As if somehow this is a badge of male hood, “I might not be able to impregnate half the twenty-something’s women of the world…. Or fix a car or even get changing the oil right the first time…. I may not be the Kung-fu champion of the world, but I have Testosterone flowing through my body because I have a SAWS-ALL!

What if a woman owned a Saws-all, do they just have Penis envy?

But there are, are there not, many things that we do not need or could be accomplished with things we already have that are badges of accomplishment? Only those who have wealth or special status have the things we long for. Oh but it does a better job right?

Will is a photographer, something he could do with the cheap throwaway cameras. Take a picture, but his pride in the equipment he has shows when he talks of it.  It does take better pictures and can do many things that that throw-a way’s can not do.  But that equipment does set him apart from many others that also like to take pictures.  With it he does an excellent job of capturing the moment too!  But is that because he owns the best equipment he can or because of his ability to use that equipment?

There is one subject I have often heard or seen, being a biker and owning a Harley.  Anyone who can afford the price can own a Harley but not everyone who owns a Harley is a “Biker”.  I was watching a documentary about one of the big bike rallies; the guy flew in to a local airport on his private jet.  He had his shiny and decked out Haley hauled in on a trailer and even had a crew that was specially hired to bring his bike where ever he wanted to bring it. Getting there did not mean to him to ride in the rain or deal with the highway traffic. He never had to try and walk after several hours in the saddle. Never had to deal with the little ole granny who seemed to look him directly in the eyes when she pulls out in front of him?  Now he was one of the biggest contributors to the cost of the rally so he did have a right to show ups and mingles. Money and not the love and life makes him the “biker”.

Now I am not going to let women off of this so easy, it is just different ways and things.  I use to make deliveries to Marion Alley, a very expensive and elite furniture store.  There was one table that always caught my eye, among all those beautiful and perfectly finished pieces of hard wood — was this butt ugly, baby puke yellow, kitchen table!  So out of place and hardly something I would think anyone with the money would have bought.  It was obvious that it had been “Antiqued” the marks left from being hit with a chain were plain.  The color was something only some that had no choice would have painted it.  I had passed this table many times and questioned it being there and how much could they have possibly been charging for it. I finally did see a price tag, lower down on one leg.  I stopped to look… It was on sale for $3,800! Three thousand and eight hundred dollars for something that even at a thrift store I had seen much better looking things!  A sales person noticed my looking and came over, “ Yes that is one of our finest pieces!”.  I was dumbfounded to say the least, she continued “ Yes it is on sale, and normally it is $4,995!”  I repeated 4,995?  “Yes, I bet it reminds you of the one your grandmother had in her kitchen!”.  I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying that “no my grandmother had taste!”.  I could imagine somewhere in East bough, there were two women meeting at one of their homes, and the exclaim of one of the women of how wonderful!  Then the prideful other replying, “And I only paid $3, 800 dollars!”.  Now it would be unique and perhaps that was what they were going for. But then so would be running down the street naked and a lot cheaper! Also not requiring taste or common sense…

Now the Saws-all will more then likely set in its case and in a cabinet in the garage.  It only use being for some time as nothing more then a bragging point rather then to rebuild the world.  As I said it does make me feel kind of silly that I would take such pride in saying I have one.

I never truly brag about the bike, only telling what it is or that I have one when asked about it.  And I do like it from the paint scheme to the ride and do feel the longing to take a ride often in the day.

It can be funny what we put pride in having?



Filed under Original writings


  1. tosmarttobegop

    Ahh I see an other hit and a miss?

  2. 6176746f6c6c65

    We with Y chromosomes just want to have the tools (or the Harley, the SS 396 Chevelle, etc.) without the analysis of our psyches.

  3. It’s funny around my house. When I comment on some kitchen tool, Griffin goes into overdrive encouraging me to have it. His enthusiasm has less to do with a new kitchen tool might bring a tasty treat than ‘cover’ for him acquiring a new tool too. If he always wants me to have any tool I may look at or comment on, then doesn’t that mean he should never be constrained if he sees a new tool he doesn’t already have?

    btw, we both have many ‘tools’ we don’t use.

  4. tosmarttobegop

    I over heard a conversation between the wives of two of the wealthy husbands who had their planes at the airport I worked at. One wife had just gotten her new plane for herself and the other said her husband would had a cow if she bought a new plane!

    The response was that her husband never said anything about what she buys.
    So she will never complain about him adding to his collection of antique farm tractors and equipment.

    • indypendent

      The phrase from the movie ‘Wayne’s World’ comes to mind when they asked the chauffer-driven car next to them if they had any Grey Poupon.

      The scenario you described is so far out of the average person’s world that they probably think you were making it up.

  5. indypendent

    When it comes to the latest tools and having to buy them – just look at the informercials on television.

    These are the products that the sales pitch is that every home should have one of these gadgets.

    I wonder how many homes have the complete set of all those infomercial gadgets stuck somehwere in the attic or the garage gathering dust? Or perhaps put into the garage sale for a fraction of what the person actually paid for the gadget.