Daily Archives: June 23, 2010

“And he kicks the ball!!!!!!!!”

Okay, that’s not quite as good as “Brady back to pass, finds Moss in the end zone, touchdown!”

Dang, it’s not even as good as “Lidstrom, takes a pass from Datsyuk. He shoots, he scores!!!!!”

Sometimes, this is even better – “Couch needs to pick up this spare for the victory….”

Americans just haven’t warmed up to the rest of the world’s favorite spectator sport. There is a great possibility that 95 out of a 100 of us couldn’t even tell you how many players are on a side (eleven including  the goalkeeper) or how long a match is (two 45 minute halves.)

And what’s with the name? In the US, it is called “soccer” but most of the rest of the world calls it “football.” To complicate matters, the Australians call it football, but their national team is the “Socceroos.”

Aside from David Beckham, who’s married to Foot Spice or some such, most Americans couldn’t even name a single soccer player. Who do these guys play for:

Landon Donovan

Ronaldo Lima

Cristiano Ronaldo

Zinedine Zidane

Lucas Podolski

Ndamukong Suh

(Answers at the end of the column.)

So, have any of you watched any World Cup action yet, or have the vuvuzela horns kept you away?  For those of you that don’t know, the World Cup is the single largest sporting event in the world and the championship of soccer, featuring 32 national teams and is currently being held in South Africa.

Nelson Mandela was scheduled to attend, but did not after the death of his great-granddaughter in a car crash the night before the opening ceremonies. She was two days past her thirteenth birthday.

Apparently, soccer is just too boring for Americans. Truthfully, that is just too bad, also, since it is a beautiful game played by elite athletes.

Maybe, one day America will join the rest of the world in appreciation of “football.”

But, probably not.


William Stephenson Clark


(Donovan – USA, Lima – Brazil, Ronaldo – Portugal, Zidane – France,  Podolski – Germany.)

(Suh is the first round draft choice of the Detroit Lions, out of Nebraska. He is 6’4″ and 307# and is considered to be one of the best ever defensive ends coming out of college. His father, Michael Suh, played soccer for Cameroon before immigrating to the US.)

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Wednesday, 6/23/10, Public Square

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