Exactly “when” were the good old days?

“I was eight years old and running with a dime in my hand
Down to bus stop to pick up a paper for my old man
I’d sit on his lap in that big old Buick and steer as we drove through town
He’d tousle my hair and say son take a good look around
This is your hometown, this is your hometown
This is your hometown, this is your hometown”

Bruce Springsteen, 1984

(The thread photo is of the now abandoned Grande Ballroom in Detroit where I saw numerous acts including the Who, Cream, Fleetwood Mac and the MC5.)

In troubled times, such as today, many people look at the past and recall fondly the “good old days.” But, in all honesty, were the “good old days” really that good?

For many, the “good old days” were their childhoods – a simpler time when Mommy and Daddy took care of the big issues and a child was mostly concerned with school and play.

To be honest, my childhood was by far the most miserable time of my life.  At six I was torn away from the grandparents that loved me and shortly thereafter dumped at an orphanage, to eventually be adopted by “good Christian” parents that had no business having children.

I’m not asking for pity for the previous comment, just expressing a fact.

I grew up in the Fifties and Sixties with all the social upheaval that entailed, and came of age in the Seventies. I served my sentence in the corporate world and tried to be what it was thought that I should be; the middle-class manager with a house in the suburbs and the de rigueur three children and an SUV.

For me, the “good old days” begin tomorrow. As I rapidly approach sixty, I have my children and grandchildren, all relatively healthy and happy. I have my three cats and two dogs. I have my many friends and my many personal interests and hobbies.

I still have my many bad habits, but if I didn’t, I would be perfect and that is a terrible burden to bear.

When I hear those that long for the “good old days,” I have to think; just “when” were the “good old days?” The days of discrimination (which still continues) and fear-mongering (which still continues) and a lack of equality for women (which still continues)?

What was so “good” about the “good old days?”


William Stephenson Clark

77 Comments

Filed under family, Life Lessons

77 responses to “Exactly “when” were the good old days?

  1. Great wisdom, Will! When you said, “For me, the “good old days” begin tomorrow,” I was struck with admiration for that attitude! I think our world would be a better place if many more people shared that optimism and worked together to make it so.

    • I haven’t read all of the comments, but you made me think of that Billy Joel lyric…

      “The good old day’s weren’t always good and tomorrow ain’t as bad as it seems.”

  2. I remember times when compromise was possible, and that’s something that must belong to “the good old days,” in the political world anyway.

    Sometimes I think if I had been a legislator when those idiots who decided to waste time and my tax money to impeach President Clinton with knowledge there wasn’t a chance in hell of convicting him, I might have decided paybacks were in order and been likely to obstruct their agendas when possible. I remember wondering why bush received any cooperation! Yet, most voted to give him authority for his war of choice (although it was supposed to be the very last option and wasn’t).

    Today when we speak about The Party of Hell No have you noticed how often you’ll get the smart aleck “karma is a bitch” and “paybacks are hell” comments? Yep, supporters of bush the lesser always think he had no cooperation from Democratic legislators in that instance. But when you bring up his war of choice they’ll quickly point out how many Democratic votes he got supporting it.

    They like having it both ways, don’t they? Or is this yet another example of their poor memories?

  3. Why was it safe to play outside way past dark when I was a kid, but it isn’t safe now? Remember when we walked home from everywhere? Is the instant communication what scares us? Media loves the story that scares. We learn so quickly about the perverts in our population. They didn’t suddenly multiple in recent times, did they? Maybe we didn’t hear about them so often?

    • indypendent

      We have always had the perverts in our midst but I don’t think it was so common knowledge as it is today. The more we know, the more we fear?

      But I do think our society is tainted with a sexual overtone that was not so prevalent in my childhood (the 50’s and 60’s). I remember the Playboy magazines and the calendars in the garages. By today’s standards, those things were pretty tame.

      The sexual overtone I sense today seems to be of a violent and sinister type of sex. I think that is why we are so seeing so much of the child molesters. The sexual overtone today seems to be all about control.

      One reason the kids cannot play safely outside anymore is that we have lost the ‘community’ feeling that we all had back in my childhood.

      People just don’t seem to think they should care about what happens to anybody else.

      Maybe because we are all too busy working to just survive? It now takes both parents working to keep the bills paid rather than the norm of the dad working and the stay-at-home mom during my childhood?

      But I remember a few working moms in my town. They were usually widows or their husbands were disabled or lost their job.

      The last few decades (since Reagan), we have seen the middle class pushed out of living-wage jobs into jobs with low wages and no health care benefits. And how are families to survive on that?

      Is our country’s push to make Big Business the Supreme Ruler going to be our downfall?

      • wicked

        I grew up in the 50s & 60s and both of my parents worked. I guess I was the odd kid out on the block. Most moms stayed home. My mom worked, some of that on the road for a week or two at a time. She did market research for companies like Quaker. I ate Cap’n Crunch long before any of you ever heard of it. 😛

        Because of all that, I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom and be there for my kids. That worked out sometimes, although not always.

  4. itolduso

    A contributing factor to the “It now takes both parents working to keep the bills paid rather than the norm of the dad working and the stay-at-home mom during my childhood” was Gloria Steinem and the whole women’s movement. Now, before anybody gets their panties in a wad, there were lots of good things that came out of the women’s movement. Women should have the same opportunites as men. WOmen should never be treated as chattel. Women should be able to do whatever they are capable of doing. Agree one hundred percent. However, the radical portion of that movement insisted that women who stayed at home with their kids were not women at all, but some sort of slaves, or were “unfulfilled” unless they worked outside the home. Many, many women who did not need the financial resources went to work out of some sense of solidarity. As funds became available, families spent more. As families spent more, prices rose. That further reduced the buying capabilities of single wage earner families. More and more families were forced to resort to both parents working to survive.
    Not that was the only contributing factor, but it was a large one. The plain simple fact is that prices cannot rise any further than the customer is willing or able to pay.
    In addition, the basic requirements of most households have increased dramatically. Cable or Satellite TV, Cell phones for everyone, Nike or Tommy Hilfinger clothing, 52 inch flat screen TVs. etc. Vacations to Cancun, or on the Love Boat. Most of these things, or the comparable for the age, were not part of the middle class fabric of life. Now, many whine if they can’t have them. Consumerism is not just the province of the right, but of society as a whole. It has taken it’s toll.

  5. 6176746f6c6c65

    While I think the cause and effect of which you post is reversed (prices and costs began increasing due to a number of factors thus resulting in more married women working “outside the home” and giving support to the womens movement not the converse) I agree that the ultimate outcome is/was the situation in which we now find ourselves. Consumerism has, IMHO, always been the main engine of the U.S. economy.

    Given that no one wants to see values of property, wages, goods decrease (which again in my opinion is what would be needed as a ‘correction’ to place things in the status quo ante) and given that it seems the workforce needs as to size has increased to where there are not enough bodies (qualified or not) to fill the jobs available if limited primarily to those with a Y chromosome, I don’t see any answer.

    And, for a final thought, prices can rise past the level where a customer is willing or able to pay if there is no price elasticity of demand for the good or service. The end result may well be there are no consumers alive to take advantage of the said product (think certain foods, water, and even medical care), but all it would take is one.

  6. itolduso

    6176746f6c6c65-

    Well, I guess we will have to just disagree. Wich is okay too. Having lived thru that time, and having made many “material” sacrifices so that my wife could stay home with the kids while those spearheading the both parents working movement, it is not my experience. And to just head it off, it was with mutual consent that my wife stayed home, and we did without. She believed then, and believes now, that childrearing IS a job, and a very important one. As our children got older, and needed less and less from her, her working outside the home became a reality, as there was a less and less demand for her time. She eventually went back to work full time. Those were her choices, not forced upon her by me, or by the society group we were part of, including our church.

  7. And I think staying home became one of the options for women. I have such great confidence in women it would be difficult to convince me that more than a handful of very shallow women left their homes to seek employment because they were ‘expected’ to do so. I obviously know women of great character, great strength and great intelligence!

    • tosmarttobegop

      But there was the stigma imposed on the women who did not work outside the home.
      With the monumental movement and striving for women’s place and acceptance within the work place and equal status.

      As often happens, women became their own enemy and women who chose to stay home were often treated as traitors to the cause. That or being thought of as belittled or control by their husbands.
      Having done both now, give me work outside the home any time!
      Much easier and less feeling like being put up on and for granted.

      Though not directed at me, I still remember hearing the snide remarks and thoughts made about “House wives”.

      Another point I will comment on, I myself have said it that part of the problem with the children these days is both mom and dad working. Back in the “good ole days” a child getting out of school knew certain things.

      Do not waste time getting home because you knew there was someone there expecting you home.
      Do not go somewhere else that no one knew you would be going much for the first thing.
      Do not come home and mess with things you should not be since mom or dad was right there.

      Too many time now a child is left setting in front of the school or having to kill time till one or the other parent comes home. Alone at home or in the neighborhood and not accountable to anyone close or home.

      As a custodian at both a Middle school and a Elementary school I have seen children dropped off and waiting for a door to be opened so they could get in. In some case as early as five A.M. !
      While even the custodian would not be getting there till six or seven.

      • indypendent

        In my opinion, this speaks to the breakdown of the family. But I still wonder why our society has gotten away from the community feeling?

        I remember a working mom would drop her kids off at my house before school because I was fortunate enough to not have to work outside the home. I watched her kids until it was time for her kids and my kids to go to school together and then they would come home together and I watched them until the mom got off work.

        Often grandparents would be doing this very same thing to help out. Is our society too busy to be helping out when needed now?

        Or is it because we have become such a mobile society that we are no longer within easy driving distance of our families? Or is grandma working now and there is no one to watch out for the school age kids?

        We do have alot of single parents in our schools. Is that another factor?

        I just don’t know – that’s why I am throwing out all this stuff.

  8. itolduso

    “have such great confidence in women it would be difficult to convince me that more than a handful of very shallow women left their homes to seek employment because they were ‘expected’ to do so”

    Maybe your circle was very limited. Mine not so much.

    “I obviously know women of great character, great strength and great intelligence!”

    Yeah, me too.

  9. You seem to be taking offense at those women who chose to stay home, or making judgments about those who chose not to. I feel that isn’t your right. You and your wife together made decisions that fit you and her, others made decisions that fit them. Intimating that my circle of women may have been limited is not necessary. I am a woman.

  10. WSClark

    “The Birth of Punk!” Detroit’s Grande Ballroom, 1968. Led by the MC5 and Iggy (Pop) and the Stooges, the Detroit music scene exploded with a sound heretofore never heard of either side of the Atlantic. Loud, nasty, in your face, it would not be called “punk” for nearly a decade, but these Detroit area bands are credited for giving rise to the style later made famous by the Sex Pistols and the Ramones, as well as many, many more.

    I first saw the Five along with the Stooges in the summer of ’68, at the Grande. The Ballroom was on the second floor of a decrepit old building on the west side of Detroit. In the Twenties, it had been just as the name implies, a ballroom for that style of dancing.

    Some of the greatest names in Rock history played there, far too many to mention.

    So, I give you – the sounds of my youth – the MC5 and “Kick Out the Jams!” recorded live at the Grande Ballroom, October 31, 1968.

    (Caution: MF alert.)

    “I done kick ’em out!

  11. Why is it some men are judgmental about women making decisions, having choices, deciding the issues on their own? They seem to have a need to justify what should be a given. I don’t have words to express my appreciation for the men who honor women’s rights, but want to say a simple and sincere thank you!

  12. itolduso

    “You seem to be taking offense at those women who chose to stay home, or making judgments about those who chose not to. I feel that isn’t your right. ”

    It’s your right to have whatever opinion you want. I expressed mine, based on my experience.

    “Intimating that my circle of women may have been limited is not necessary. I am a woman”

    So what. Doesn;t mean your circle of friends wasn;t limited to a particular opinion. Your comment seemed to me a “remark” about the superiority of the women you knew, versus the woman I know. I replied in a straight forward manner.

    • I didn’t mean anything other than women are of great character, great strength and great intelligence! Enough character, strength and intelligence to be trusted to make our own decisions.

  13. itolduso

    “Why is it some men are judgmental about women making decisions, having choices, deciding the issues on their own”

    I don;t have a problem with it. I simply noted that I believe it had a significant impact on the monetary side of our society.

  14. “However, the radical portion of that movement insisted that women who stayed at home with their kids were not women at all, but some sort of slaves, or were “unfulfilled” unless they worked outside the home.”

    Those are the women only you seem to have been acquainted with. Or, perhaps those were the judgments you made about some women. I didn’t have any need to make such judgments.

  15. itolduso

    “Housewives] are dependent creatures who are still children…parasites.” ~ Gloria Steinem, “What It Would Be Like If Women Win,” Time, August 31, 1970

    “[The] housewife is a nobody, and [housework] is a dead-end job. It may actually have a deteriorating effect on her mind…rendering her incapable of prolonged concentration on any single task. [She] comes to seem dumb as well as dull. [B]eing a housewife makes women sick.” ~ Sociologist Jessie Bernard in The Future of Marriage, 1982.

    “Women owe Frieden an incalculable debt for The Feminine Mystique…. Domesticity was not a satisfactory story of an intelligent woman’s life.” ~ Elizabeth Fox-Genovese, Feminism Is Not the Story of My Life, 1996.

    Being a housewife is an illegitimate profession… The choice to serve and be protected and plan towards being a family-maker is a choice that shouldn’t be. The heart of radical feminism is to change that.” ~ Vivian Gornick, University of Illinois, “The Daily Illini,” April 25, 1981.

    • Here, once again, is the post that got your panties in a wad —

      I posted: “And I think staying home became one of the options for women. I have such great confidence in women it would be difficult to convince me that more than a handful of very shallow women left their homes to seek employment because they were ‘expected’ to do so. I obviously know women of great character, great strength and great intelligence!”

      Bringing words from four women who may or may not have been among those handful of very shallow women doesn’t mean my circle of women was limited, or that your opinion is anything more or less than your opinion.

  16. itolduso

    “Those are the women only you seem to have been acquainted with”

    HAHA. Sorry, no cigar for you. As part of that era, I knew women of all stripes and opinions. Some radical feminists, some homemakers by choice, some breadwinners by choice, even some stay at home moms because of societal pressure.

    Assuming whom and what I know is dangerous business.

  17. Speak to the hand.

    There is no cow on the ice.

  18. WSClark

    Perhaps, we should return to this kind of thinking:

    Senator: Women should not vote

    “I’m an old-fashioned woman, Senator. Kay O’Connor told The Kansas City Star. “Men should take care of women, and if men were taking care of women (today) ‘we wouldn’t have to vote.”

    “If I don’t get re-elected, my only punishment is to go home to my husband and my roses and my children and my grandchildren,” she said. ~And if the trips to Topeka get to be too much and my husband asks me to quit, I would.”

    As an aside, Kay O’Connor came to my door in Olathe when I lived there, campaigning. I told her to “get the Hell off my porch!”

    • indypendent

      Interesting tidbit there that this woman would quit if her husband asked her to.

      How passionate was this woman about being a representative of her constituents if she would throw them over at the drop of one word from her husband to quit the job?

      Seems to me she was more suited to be a preacher – oh, wait a minute – alot of denominations don’t like that either.

      Aw shucks, she just needs to go back to her rose garden and be quiet.

  19. itolduso

    Perhaps not.

  20. itolduso

    “But you are allowed to assume who and what I know?”

    you are right. I made the same mistake you did. I apologize. I assume that you knew women in the 70s during the radical feminist movement of all strips and convictions. My bad. I apologize

  21. itolduso

    “[As long as the woman] is the primary caretaker of childhood, she is prevented from being a free human being.” ~ Kate Millett, Sexual Politics, 1969.

  22. There are women like Palin who advocate, in my opinion, ‘undoing’ some of the hard-fought advances in women’s rights. Each woman should have the right to make decisions for herself, those that she has concluded are best for her and any family she may impact. Kinda like white men have always enjoyed. Those who fall outside that ‘white men’ category will catch up, won’t give ground, won’t give any rights back, will make their own decisions and allow others the same rights.

  23. itolduso,

    I am a woman in my sixties. I have been well aware of women and the women’s rights issues for over 60 years. Just so you have no need to ‘assume’ anything with regard to me.

    Do you approve of or agree with everything that is said by every male? Do you think every word uttered by any male should be related to all other males?

  24. itolduso

    “There are women like Palin who advocate, in my opinion, ‘undoing’ some of the hard-fought advances in women’s rights.”

    Since I don;t follow the fool Palin, I am not aware of those rights she wants to undo. Perhaps you could enlighten me.

    I never said women should do this or that. I gave what I consider to be a solely economic consequence of the women’s movement.

    solely economic

    • The post you made at 10:44 a.m. made judgments about women while you were making what your call ‘solely economic’ statements.

      We’re each unique individuals, no matter our sex, our race, our religion, our creed, our sexuality, our economic status… Each individual deserves the same level of rights as the next — and that includes the right to make our own decisions based on our own unique position and circumstances, without another human judging.

      None of us should be grouped or be subject to generalizations, because each of us is much more than any category could describe.

    • I am not aware of those rights she wants to undo. Perhaps you could enlighten me.

      If you are interested, I’m sure you’ll find information and if you’re not interested you won’t.

  25. WSClark

    Since I am constitutionally incapable to keep my mouth shut, let me throw my $0.02 in……

    In my view, the “women’s movement” is quite like the “choice movement.” What I mean is, being pro-choice does not mean being pro-abortion. It simply means being capable of seeing women as equals and “allowing,” for want of a better word, them to make their own choices.

    I have stated before, I am personally anti-abortion but firmly pro-choice.

    When I was married, my wives did not work, but stayed home with the children. That was a choice I (we) made for our family.

    When I had custody of my son, starting at the age of two, I obviously had to work and it had an effect on him, but I was able to work through that.

    I support equality for everyone, in every manner – without reservation. We will never truly be a free society until every last person is treated with dignity, respect and is extended equality in every aspect of their lives.

    • Exactly. People, all people, without qualifiers.

      • itolduso

        That includes men, Republicans, conservatives, christians, etc. Thanks for the support.

      • “That includes men, Republicans, conservatives, christians, etc. Thanks for the support.”

        Yes, all people, no matter who they are, what sex, race, sexual persuasion, religion, political stripe… Would those all be ‘qualifiers’ or categories? That’s how I see them. Perhaps I am very poor at written communication, and unable to write what I want to say. I don’t want to group anyone at any time or feel the need to see any person only by any group they may be part of when it comes to the rights they should have.

        Generalizations are usually unfair. Are all men alike? Are all women alike? Are all gays alike? Are all Christians alike? I don’t think so. I don’t think any human belongs in any box and all are greater than the sum of all the qualifiers that may be used to describe them.

  26. itolduso

    “I support equality for everyone, in every manner – without reservation. We will never truly be a free society until every last person is treated with dignity, respect and is extended equality in every aspect of their lives”

    And I don;t think you can find where I have posted anything that disagreed with that statement.

    • WSClark

      I wasn’t suggesting that you had, although I strongly disagree with your initial premise.

      Any social commentary from that era (Sixties – early Seventies) needs to be considered in the context of the era.

      It is easy to forget what society had been like just a decade before Steinem’s ground-breaking book. I won’t rehash the societal upheaval of the Sixties, but in a short decade we went from the Ike Fifties to the Counter-culture Sixties.

      There were a lot of feces hitting the air conditioning units.

      • itolduso

        You are right. And a lot of it had unintended consequences. In my opinion, the economy was one.
        Unfortunately, millions are everyday influenced by bold statements of some sort or another. Whether they follow politicians, counterculterists, or, for god’s sake, advertising. The plain fact is that if advertising didn’t affect the way millions buy products, except for new products, there wouldn;t be any advertising, nor would there be endoresements. Companies don;t spend money on what they consider unproductive.

  27. itolduso

    “The post you made at 10:44 a.m. made judgments about women while you were making what your call ‘solely economic’ statements.”

    Based on direct observation. If you disagree with my opnion, that is just fine. As I said, you are entitled to it. Just as I am entitled to mine.

  28. itolduso

    And while I understand your comment WSCLARK-

    I would liken the women’s movement more to the hippy movement, if only in this one respect. The “Hippy” movement, for lack of a better term,
    was fine with different, as long as you conformed to the movement’s difference. If you had short hair, didn;t wear rags, or do some sort of mind altering drugs, you were square and not to be trusted. The motto was don;t accept the norm, but the reality was, you must accept their norm to be okay.

  29. WSClark

    “If you had short hair, didn;t wear rags, or do some sort of mind altering drugs, you were square and not to be trusted.”

    You must have lived in a different Sixties Era than I did, because none of that was true for my friends and me.

  30. itolduso

    Well WS, whatever your experience. Mine was as described. And Thomas Witt had that very discussion a year or so ago, and he agreed that i many cases it was true. . But hey, each to their own.

    • WSClark

      I graduated from High School forty years ago tomorrow. My circle of friends was quite extensive and included jocks, nerds, geeks, soldiers, squares, boneheads, morons, greasers, frats, bikers, apple-polishers, teacher’s pets, intellectuals, Jews, Christians, atheists, blacks, whites and everything in between.

  31. People don’t fit in the boxes of generalizations.

  32. itolduso

    Anyway, you all have a great day. Hug your child today. While you have a chance. Encourage them to grow up to be all they can or should be, including a stay at home Mom or Dad if they can and want to. While you have a chance. Don’t categorize people as being stupid or ignorant or whatever because they have a different philosphy than you, while you have the chance. Truly promote peace, and nonhostility, while you have a chance. Tell them you love them, while you have the chance. You never know when that chance might be taken away from you.

    Peace. Out

    • indypendent

      Wow – I leave for a few hours and come back to find a lively discussion that seemed to have been sparked by my touching on the issue of it takes two parents working now to pay the bills.

      I’ve read through all the comments and they are all good. But the point I was really trying to make was how our economy really has changed and it had nothing to do with Women’s Lib Movement.

      While alot of women did enter the workforce during that time period – they did so at the delight of the employers because it meant the employers could pay lower wages.

      And that was really my point I was trying to make – our economy has been driven by this mantra of Big Business must be given all the tax breaks and/or subsidies and the working class gets the privilege of holding a job, of which it is expected for the employee to grovel, beg and be grateful just to be employed.

      The lack of mutual respect between the employee and the employer has long been gone when the emphasis has been only on the employer making their profits at all cost – even if that means hurting our own economy by outsourcing good paying jobs.

      As for the Women’s Lib Movement – it is really just another movement – much like the Tea Party Movement. It was only a group of people with political ideas and the entire group did not hold one set of ideas as the only ideas there was in the group.

      But alot of men who seemed to be threatened by women exercising their rights, felt compelled to pigeon hole every women based on the Women’s Lib Movement.

      And that game of putting people in pigeon holes is done by every political group – yes, even Conservative Christians.

      I believe life should be a matter of balance. Too much emphasis on one group or the other and that balance will not be achieved. So, personally I have a problem with some of those Conservative Christians who push for a Theocracy and they disguise their agenda as returning to the Constitution. Well, in case they have not noticed – the Founding Fathers did not want ANY religion to be sanctioned by the Government.

      As for the current economy – unfortunately, we live in a global community – much more so than in the 50’s and 60’s. And in case the Republicans have not noticed, the entire world is in economic turmoil – not just America.

      So it is not all Obama’s fault – as we would be led to believe by the Party of No.

  33. Well, it sure took all of us plenty of words to agree to agree. More than some spend agreeing to disagree. 😉

    All done without anyone calling anyone names. Some misunderstandings and assumptions that were inaccurate, but we’re communicating without being able to hear tones, see expressions (those qualities are lacking in internet communication).

    Differences aren’t a threat. There is usually more than one way to look at everything.

    • indypendent

      Differences are fine – assumptions is what usually gets one into trouble. No one should assume that just because both parents work that it is the woman’s fault for not wanting to be at home with the kids.

      I know alot of women who work because their jobs offer health insurance and their husband’s employer does not.

    • We could find the differences in most situations, and the decisions the individuals made are probably based on those differences.

  34. itolduso

    “No one should assume that just because both parents work that it is the woman’s fault for not wanting to be at home with the kids.”

    Nobody above made such an assumption.

    • indypendent

      I’m sorry, I thought that was what you meant when you said that Gloria Steinhem was a factor as to why so many women went to work – because the Women Lib Movement saw stay-at-home moms as unfulfilled women.

  35. itolduso

    Sorry, now I feel like another poster on another blog. I got the chance to check back in, and did so. Anyway, I am out. usy night tonight for me, so you all enjoy yourselves, ya hear

    • indypendent

      Enjoy yourself and have a good night. We can all agree to disagree. But sometimes I think we are all trying to say the same thing but we are using different meanings and terminology.

      But in the end, we all must do what we think is best for us and our family. And I believe our government does have a role to provide the foundation of a strong economy to help us do just that.

      But that could be another lengthy discussion – LOL

  36. indypendent

    itolduso said: The motto was don;t accept the norm, but the reality was, you must accept their norm to be okay


    Isn’t this the same thing the current GOP is doing by requiring loyalty pledges to prove one is a ‘real’ Republican? I know alot of good moderate Republicans who are repulsed by the current GOP leaders. And these moderates are looking elsewhere and it is sure not in the Tea Party’s direction. The TP is just a hijacked version of the current GOP.

  37. indypendent

    When I hear words ‘the good old days’, my mind takes me back to my childhood in the 50’s and 60’s.

    But let’s remember in those days – the school kids were all drilled for the atom bomb attacks – remember? We had to get beneath our desks, put our heads down and then cover our heads with our hands. I always wondered why did not just go to the basement or at least had water/food in case there was a bomb attack.

    I also remembered the Cuban missile crisis when JFK was in the White House. I remembered alot of times my parents and grandparents listening intently to the president’s speech and looking worried.

    Nowadays, when the president is on television giving a speech, we have 400+ channels to turn him off and find something ‘better’ to watch. During my childhood, we had the 3 networks and the public station and all 4 had the president’s speech on!

    I remember my grandparents talking about their ‘good old days’ and they would usually talk about how the media respected FDR and never showed him in his wheelchair. I think of that today and I wonder – does the American public really have the right to ask or even know if Bill Clinton if he wore boxers or briefs?

    Have we somehow made the presidency into some kind of cartoonish joke?

    I remember when school kids used to name the president as their hero – but how many kids do that today?

    We’ve lost something from those good old days – but it is not something tangible – it is a feeling – it is a spirit that we are Americans and that we all should matter.

    But then – I think of the struggle of the Civil Rights workers during my childhood – and again, I am back to wondering – just what were the good old days?

  38. tosmarttobegop

    LOL I quit reading the posts because I kept getting side track on my thoughts!

    Good ole days? Perhaps it is because of a fawn memory that we call them that.
    The problem with it that those memories can be diluted or questioned when today we try to revisit them or are later they are attacked by a reality that happens later.

    Two cases in point, the first was the memories of a place I use to go often and could be as late as thirty years ago. Seldom anymore do I get over to area that used to be my stomping grounds.
    Today I happened to be killing time since I had the wrong day for a breakfast meeting-up.

    I wanted to see if this year I would be able to get in to do some skin diving.
    On the way to the sand pit I passed a Pawn shop I use to go to often.
    On the way back I stopped in and to my surprise the same guy who owned it was still there!

    Within five minutes it came back how it felt to deal with him, he is cold and defensive in nature.
    Though I was suddenly reminded of him, my memories did not include of how he acted.
    It was not long before I was ready to leave and get away from him!

    Another was there was a song on the radio called “ I saw God today” about the wonder of a new dad seeing his newborn child for the first time. It took me back to a day a couple of years ago.
    My oldest son and his wife went to the hospital it was time!

    His mother and I rushed there and I walked in and there was my son holding his daughter and looking down into her face. I can not explain the look on his face and eyes, I had never seen him so in wonderment of anything else in his life. Alone in the entire universe with only this one thing as the total focus of existence.
    I remember that feeling when I looked into his face back the first time I held him.

    That was a good ole day!

    Even the reality of what happened has not diminished that memory.
    Within a couple of weeks of that day his wife told him she wanted him out!
    His normal day had been working from 4:30 A.M. till 4:00 P.M. then coming straight home.
    He would either cook diner for her and him or stop on the way to get what ever she said that sounded good.
    Then he would stay up till midnight with the baby to give her a chance for uninterrupted sleep.
    Only to grab a couple of hours of sleep then back to work.

    She accused him of cheating on her!

    Exactly when he had time to cheat never was a question that she could answer. Then finally after a week she confused that the child might not be his.

    It would be three months before she finally agreed to a test and indeed the baby was not his.
    he even after all this said that he would forgive and accept and treat the child as his own.
    In his heart she still was and no test was going to stop that.

    But his wife did not want that or should it be clear no commitments.
    She enjoyed being with any man she wanted at the time that was her words not mine or his.

    Every time I heard that song, tears come to my eyes remembering that day when I saw my son looking into the face of God.

    • indypendent

      I don’t know what to say but God bless your son. What a horrible ordeal to be put through.

      You’re right, seeing your own child holding their baby is such a thrill. I knew my son was tender hearted, even though he acted all macho and tough. But when his baby girl was placed into his arms – this tough guy broke into the biggest smile and the tears were flowing. They were pure tears of joy.

      Life is not fair and sometimes we just have to shake our heads and wonder why.

      But then we get glimpses of some really good stuff life brings us and we keep hanging on to the hope that more of that good stuff will come our way.

  39. The atom bomb attack drills at my grade school involved lots of parents coming to the school, all us kids loading in to cars (in an orderly fashion!), and the cars driving a predetermined route. As I look back, I think we were practicing be driven to bomb shelters, although all we actually practiced was the orderly loading into cars and sitting quietly while we were driven this predetermined route and returned to school so we could unload (again in an orderly manner!). 🙂

  40. WSClark

    Jeez, there is one thing that I can say about the columns I write for this blog – I don’t have a damned clue where they are going after they are posted!

    For that matter, I have no clue as to those that are going to garner hits and those that receive a lukewarm reception.

    When I wrote this one, I never thought it would turn into a lively discussion of the women’s movement from the early Seventies. Shows you what I know!

    Dang, I’ll just keep writing them and watch what happens.

    Cheers!

  41. WSClark

    The second half of Detroit’s contribution to the punk rock world!

    As hard as it may seem to be possible, the Stooges made the MC5 look a bit like Pat Boone. Their concerts were mayhem, the sound deafening and Iggy was a showman – crazed and all – that made everyone else look positively church choir-ish.

    From 1969, the Stooges – “I Wanna Be Your Dog.”

  42. WSClark

    Well, you’ll have to go to You Tube to hear it…….

    Iggy and the Stooges – I Wanna Be Your Dog, 1969.

  43. indypendent

    To show you how naive I am, when I saw the the name The Stooges – I was thinking of Moe, Larry and Curly.

    Silly me – soitenly!

    LOL

  44. tosmarttobegop

    The story continues…. Since then he had met a wonderful young women who’s very smile melts his heart and captures his soul. One day when the time is right once again he will look down and see the universe all focused in the small face of the greatest creation.

    He could create a cure for cancer or make a piece of art that is the sum total of all of the greatest endeavors of human kind…And I could not be more proud of him then that day when I saw him looking into the face of his daughter.