Contest: Name Sarah Palin’s Memoir

palin_winkSarah will be publishing a memoir this spring.  She will cover her trials and tribulations, Politico reports.

The article says unnamed sources confide that a title for this memoir has not been chosen.  Let’s help Sarah out.  Post your suggestion for the name of her autobiography.  If any, or all, are good, I will forward them to the Governor’s office.

My choice: Did Life Throw Me Some Curves?  You Betcha – wink, wink…

Another idea:  Too Few to Pray with, Too Many to Monitor…

One more:  Pallin’ Around with Jesus, Instead of Terrorists…

Sorry.  I will stop now.

Other comments, unrelated to a title, of course,  are welcome, too.

Winners of the contest can get to have lunch on  iggy – in a place of my choosing… (fnord may chip in too).

Deadline for entry:  A week from today – 05-20-09.

iggy donnelly

71 Comments

Filed under Book Reviews, Elections, Life Lessons, Religion, Sarah Palin, Wingnuts!, Woman Power

71 responses to “Contest: Name Sarah Palin’s Memoir

  1. “Sarah Palin: First Woman President” Sounds good to me : ]

  2. There’s a wonderful discussion of this announcement going on at my favorite Alaskan blog, The Mudflats.

    — snip —

    “The Audacity of Hype! Palin Signs Book Deal. But is it Legal?

    Hey, wait a minute now. What about that clause in the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act that says:

    The head of a principal executive department (the governor) of the state (Alaska) may not accept employment (being an author under contract) for compensation (money) outside the agency that the executive head serves (being the governor of the state of Alaska)?’

    If you followed the parenthetical explanation, you’ll see that basically, that’s supposed to mean that the governor can’t have another job.

    Palin said the book won’t interfere with her duties as governor, and others have written books while in leadership positions. She said she won’t work on the book during state time and will be jotting down her thoughts “after hours.”

    Here’s a little 60 second dramatization to clarify that for those of you who are still confused.

    Alaskans: But Governor, you’re not supposed to have another paying job while you’re the governor. See? (we hold up the Alaska Executive Branch Ethics Act and point)

    SP: But the paying job won’t interfere with my duties.

    Alaskans: But you’re not supposed to HAVE another paying job.

    SP: But other people have done it in other states, and in other positions.

    Alaskans: But our ethics act says your not supposed to have another paying job while you’re governor of Alaska!

    SP: But I’m only going to work at my other paying job after hours. You know, like moonlighting!

    Alaskans: But you’re not supposed to have ANY other paying job while you’re the governor!

    SP: I’ll just be jotting thoughts in my own words… And you don’t even have to know how much I’m making.

    Alaskans: But you’re NOT SUPPOSED TO HAVE ANY OTH…. Does anyone have any whiskey?

    (whiskey break)

    Back in February, Bill McAllister, Palin’s communications director pointed out to us that the governor is the governor all the time. That’s why she does such a great job.

    “In fact she works 24/7, on call 24/7 constantly monitoring what’s going on in all of state government and isn’t hesitant to make course corrections any old time, and I can tell you personally that I have often responded to her emails late at night or early in the morning. She is on top of it.”

    Go Sarah! Palin 2012! Exciting, isn’t it!? Like Americans are ready for another law breaker in our highest office, one who has no sense of proper ethics either.

  3. ““Sarah Palin: First Woman President” Sounds good to me : ]”

    Sounds absolutely positively wonderful to me! I’m pulling for Palin to be the Republican Party candidate! There is no one currently on the radar who excites all people any more than her!

    GO SARAH! PALIN 2012!

    😉

  4. I’m fairly certain everyone recognizes I’m no fan of Palin, but to make it perfectly clear so no one misunderstands — she is an embarrassment at the deepest level to me as a woman. I’m not alone in my opinion, therefore, I do hope she is the candidate on the Republican ticket in 2012!

  5. Iggy,

    I can’t think of any title ideas better than the ones you suggested! Very good, each one!

    Let’s see your first suggestion covers her beauty and appeal to men (covertly, but it’s there).

    Second one addresses her radical religious views, and hints that she would love to legislate morality.

    And lastly, her ability to stir up radicals, get ’em mad and energized.

    The only thing I can think of is:

    ‘Word Salad — Written, Not Spoken”

  6. iggydonnelly

    Yes. Palin in 2012. We have to keep Tina Fey (“I can see Russia from my house”) employed after all.

  7. iggydonnelly

    fnord,
    I think the “Audacity of Hype” is excellent and definitely worth appropriating.

  8. iggydonnelly

    What I love most about Sarah (besides her being a Republican) is that she is a caricature of a caricature. Remember the Coen brother movie _Fargo_?

    Sarah’s accent sounds exactly like Marge Gunderson – the Law Enforcement protagonist of the story.

    I am pretty sure the GOP thinks of Sarah as some sort of populist hero. They seem to be confusing populist heroes with jokes.

    Memoir suggestion:

    “My Life” by Sarah Palin; subtitled, “I Am Not a Joke!”

  9. iggydonnelly

    Another title suggestion:

    _An Embarassment In Exile_.

  10. Well, she’s for illegal abortions*, she’s for no gun restrictions, and she is against gay marriage. Does that cover all the ‘social’ Republican talking points and none of what put the ‘grand’ in the Grand Ole Party?

    *Hat tip to our friend, Monkeyhawk! We all realize that making abortion illegal won’t stop them, just make them dangerous again. Most thinking people are ready to address ways to reduce the numbers of abortions rather than the futility of changing the law.

  11. tosmarttobegop

    SARAH PALIN, A BOOK OF MY TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS!
    (will someone please read it to me? thank ya Sarah!)

  12. QnofHrts

    A Pitbull wearing lipstick
    The Sarah Palin story.

    • QnofHrts

      ya know – pitbull mixes can be awesome dogs with very sweet dispositions. But a pure blooded pitbull is usually nucking futs!!!

  13. iggydonnelly

    QnofHrts,

    “Pitbull wearing lipstick” – I like it.

  14. jammer5

    “The Witches of Wasilla, or how I excommunicated them and became a vice-presidential nominee.”

  15. iggydonnelly

    One of the questions I can’t help but ponder:

    “Where does the GOP find people like Sarah Palin and Clarence Thomas?”

    If you were to set out on a holy quest to find more Sarahs and Clarences, where would you start? To make this interesting, let us suppose that combing through the rolls of GOP contributors would be too time consuming. Where then?

  16. Evangelical churches would be a place to start. Go right to the top — to the ministers who feed the flock the nonsense they live by. If they mention how badly The Constitution needs to be rewritten to more closely resemble the Bible, you’re on the right track.

  17. iggydonnelly

    fnord,

    Karl Rove called. He wondered if you’d be interested in some work?

  18. iggydonnelly

    That last post was a joke. As the lead singer of “Angry Johnny and the Killbillies” said – “everything I say is a joke.”

  19. My submission;
    SARAH SIXPACK

    Subtitle:
    I can see real Americans from here….

  20. wicked

    “She said she won’t work on the book during state time and will be jotting down her thoughts “after hours.”

    Of course she won’t! The woman is a saint among sinners.

    We can overlook how she tried to bilk the State of Alaska.

    Tell ya what. I’d hate to be the copyeditor on her book. I heard Twilight was a mess, but Sarah would beat that record in the blink of an eye.

    But I do have promotional suggestions for her.

    [title of book]: Better than sleeping pills!

    [title of book]: The answer to insomnia.

    [title of book]: Use by grammar teachers all over the country for examples of how NOT to write or speak.

  21. wicked

    Here’s my title contribution.

    Are You There, God? It’s Me, Sarah. I’m Here To Take Over Your Job.

    Obviously I’m uninspired by Ms. Palin.

  22. g-stir

    Another title:” I’m In the Dark Most of the Day!”.

  23. wicked

    Who Needs A Mind When They Can Shoot Animals From An Airplane?

  24. g-stir

    “Iditarod.., and So Can You”

  25. iggydonnelly

    From Reuters:

    “‘There have been so many things written and said through mainstream media that have not been accurate, and it will be nice through an unfiltered forum to get to speak truthfully about who we are and what we stand for and what Alaska is all about,’ Palin said in an interview published on the Anchorage Daily News Web site earlier on Tuesday.”

    “Palin complained during last year’s unsuccessful campaign about having her comments ‘filtered’ by the mainstream media.”

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090513/pl_nm/us_palin_3

    Remember that other guy who complained about the “media filter” — what was his name???

  26. iggydonnelly

    Harper Collins will publish the book. That press is owned by who???

    Wait for it….

    Rupert Murdock.

    Sounds unfiltered to me… And just a little “Fair and Imbalanced”…

    The trail – News Corp owns Haper Collins, and from Wiki – “The company’s Chairman, Chief Executive Officer and Founder is Rupert Murdoch.”

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/News_Corporation

    Loon, wake up. Would you take Rupert back? He is yours for free…

    • frigginloon

      No….No….No….he is all your’s with a cherry on top. Even his son doesn’t like him since he re-married and had more children. Nothing worse than a diluted inheritance.

  27. kolys

    I’m all for Governor KewpieDoll coming out with a book; the longer she is in the public eye, the more the GOP will stay divided against itself.

    A few suggested titles:

    “My Life as a Tina Fey Impersonator”
    “Lipstick on a pig still gets you swine flu.”
    “Still Mavericky After All That Year.”

    Suggested liner notes:

    “I can shoot Russia from here.”
    “Keeping all Alaska’s ghostwriters employed.”
    “The photo pages are laminated!”

    • iggydonnelly

      All of those are excellent…

      We are starting to have too many good choices. A problem I like.

  28. jammer5

    “How I bitch-slapped Katie Couric and got fondled by Joe the Plumber.”

  29. g-stir

    “I’m So Far Right… I’m Lost!”

  30. wicked

    Wow! I’m going to employ you all (unpaid, of course) to come up with titles for my next book, whenever that happens.

    I freely admit and have informed my editor that I suck at titles. However, I did have 2 titles out of 6 books stick. At least 1 was a later suggestion I sent within a list of suggestions and 2 others were variations on suggestions.

  31. wicked

    Iggy,

    Harper Collins isn’t that bad about being Right, at least in some areas. I’m not so sure about politics though. There are some truly Conservative publishers out there, although I don’t remember which ones. Mostly all small, special focus (politics) publishers. IIRC, one of them published the Swiftboat book.

    • iggydonnelly

      Yeah, I know wicked. After all Haper Collins published Tony Hillerman’s work. I remember seeing the movie “Thelma and Louise” and was impressed they had a copy of one of his books on their bedside table.

      One year when I was in the pueblo in Taos, I was impressed that one of the “apartment” occupants had a copy of _A Thief of Time_ in their front room.

      Hillerman died within the last year — which was too bad. He was an Oklahoma boy, too, btw.

  32. wicked

    Out of curiosity, I went to Harper Collins’ website and searched for “politics”. Funny how most books that showed up were religious. :/

    This one might be interesting:
    http://www.harpercollins.com/books/9780310267300/Myth_of_a_Christian_Nation/index.aspx

  33. tosmarttobegop

    “My Life as a Tina Fey Impersonator”

    rolflao

  34. jammer5

    My Life: How to think for ones self and still not have a clue.

  35. kolys

    If Not For Abstinence, Bristol And Piper Wouldn’t Have Had Time To Write This Book For Me.

  36. kolys

    “I’d Teabag Ya, If I But Could”

  37. g-stir

    “I Don’t Brake for Moose—Or My Road Killing Experiences in Alaska”

  38. You guys are really good! How can ONE winner be chosen!?

  39. How could anyone choose only one? It’s (how did the President say that?) above my pay grade!

    Maybe we’ll have to plan a picnic! For everyone.

  40. frigginloon

    OK, the Loon has woken up and it looks like I missed out on all the fun…Palin titles

    “I Would Have Beaten Hillary, You Betcha”
    ” Honey, Can You Look After The Kids”
    “Democrats Make Good Floor Rugs”
    “What’s Cooking With Sarah”
    “Republicans For Dummies”
    ” How to Mount a Moose”
    “This Turkey’s Stuffed”
    “Sarah Palin Reloaded”

  41. jammer5

    Free autographed Moose Pie recipe with every book purchase.

  42. iggydonnelly

    Kolys,
    Please visit again. Glad to have your company!

  43. iggydonnelly

    My dear spouse is leaning towards: “My Life as a Tina Fey Impersonator”. That one is awesome. Hope to read more. Later, Iggy…

  44. wicked

    Good one, Mrs. Iggy! 🙂

    Or “My Life Impersonating Humans”.

    I LOVE Sarah. Can’t you tell?

    (‘scuse me while I go worship at the porcelain shrine for that remark.)

  45. frigginloon

    Hmm, maybe it should just be a coloring-in book. Keep it real simple!

  46. The Mudflats held this contest too (wonder how many blogs around the country have followed suit?). They have over 700 replies to the post, and many are hilarious, but not funnier than ours. There is going to be a list from among their suggestions — a looooong list — made into a poll and readers will cast votes.

    The thing I see, and hard-core wingnuts won’t see, is that Sarah Palin is a joke.

    Go Sarah! Palin 2012!

  47. A few from The Mudflats that veered in different directions than we took here:

    All My Daughters Children

    The Book Of Sarah
    Who Needs A Key, When God Is Your LockSmith

    Armed And Disingenuous The Sarah Palin Story

    I Was Right People Will Believe Anything

    Speaking in Tongues: An Autobiography of Sarah Palin

    Ban This Book! The Sarah Palin Story

    Absinthe. Obstinance, Absence or Abstinence: I’m sure one of these will work!

  48. Bad Biker

    My submission:

    Title: “Sarah Palin: I Pack My Brains In My Bra!”

    Subtitle: “And Republican Men Love My Brains!”

  49. frigginloon

    Hey while you are at it, I think titles to George W’s memoirs should be included in a future post!

  50. g-stir

    ” Dub-Yah : My Rememberfications”

  51. iggydonnelly

    I think the W. memoir thread is an excellent idea. And that was certainly a good start G-stir.

  52. g-stir

    More correctly:

    ” Dub-Yah : My Rememberfications” by Dick Cheny

  53. lilacluvr

    Palin’s book title :

    Pitbull with Lipstick: The Pageant Walk to the White House

  54. lilacluvr

    George W’s book title:

    Hey Dick – I Still Have Those Puppet Strings!

  55. lilacluvr

    Sarah Palin’s 2012 bumper sticker:

    A Moose for Every Real American

  56. The suggestions which made the poll and are being voted on by readers at The Mudflats is up. Some great ideas, but Sarah hasn’t ever proven to listen to great advice so I don’t expect her to gain anything from this.

    http://www.themudflats.net/2009/05/14/sarah-palins-book-title-time-to-vote/